This post is adapted from a testimony that I shared in my church recently. It is a testimony from behind the scenes of what God is doing with this blog and on into my life and it is also an encouragement for others to sow seeds. It’s like getting to watch the special features of a movie. This is not just a thing that I decided to do one day. There’s a battle going on and there’s a woman with her fight face on here. I want people to flourish. I want people to walk closely with God. I want people to live in the hope that he has for them and to know his love and his abundance. I want to ruin the enemy’s plans over people’s lives so that they can know true freedom. So, here we go.
I got baptised rather late in my Christian walk and when I did I shared about the struggle and condemnation that we can face from ourselves and the enemy in that process. Oh, so much condemnation. But in that process I also got really fuelled by a burning anger towards the enemy. My parting shot to him was this: “When I do this thing I will NOT be doing it alone. I’ll be bringing others along with me. Just. You. Watch. Me. Bring glory to God through this.” That’s what it means for me to be on the front line with Jesus. You’ve probably heard the saying, “No one walks alone”, but I like to go by the saying, “No one fights alone.” Because God calls us to fight for our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ: in prayer, in words of encouragement, in accountability, in training in the ways of God, in doing life beside each other.
I was so excited to see my friend get baptised and share about it recently, because she is my right-hand warrior. It means so much to me to get to walk through that journey with her, to be a part of something that gives God such delight, after experiencing God’s delight in my own journey. As much as it pains the staunch side of me to admit it, I was struggling not to burst out crying, like, the whole time. Something I have come to know is that the fruit that grows from the seeds that we sow is even more beautiful than the seed itself.
That was the entree. But we’ll come back to that later. For dessert.
I want to share what God started with me during lockdown. I am a homesteading country mum and this is my blog, Twiglet Homestead. I write about all sorts of things that go on on our small country property: growing vegetables and fruit trees for my family, raising chickens for eggs and meat, building projects, cooking and preserving, knitting… There is so much going on that I can’t even write about all of it.
Now, God spoke to me a little while back about doing devotional blog posts, on a Friday, called Faith Friday. I was excited about this, but I thought, “How on earth am I going to have time to do that when I can’t even manage to post every week about the usual things?
Then lockdown was announced. All of a sudden, I found myself in an episode of fear. Thankfully, through my quiet time with God, I realised that I had let myself get into a state of serious fear. I was rundown and emotional, my small child had a bad cough at the most nerve-wracking time ever and my husband had to keep going out into the world to work at that point. But I had let feelings of fear and some insecurities about myself and God turn into living in fear. That was not cool. When I dug into the issue with God and acknowledged my sinful beliefs at the root of it, and grabbed God’s truth that he’s got this, I quickly started to be released from the grip of fear.
But it didn’t stop there. Because it’s not just about me. I knew I wasn’t the only one dealing with fear. I got a very strong sense of the devil looking out upon the people of the world and laughing at all those puny little people falling over themselves in fear as this virus spread and the fear spread even faster. And I got SO angry at him. How dare he make me feel like that! How dare he make other people feel like that! That righteous anger spurns me to fight for God’s glory and the restoration of the people that he created. I had to share about my experience. Yes, I felt some shame about it, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me.
Paul says in 2 Corinthians 11:30
“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.”
And then in 2 Corinthians 12:9
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness…”” (emphasis added)
And so, my first Faith Friday devotional was born. And then I committed to writing one for each Friday for the rest of level 4 lockdown.
Now, my blog is a homesteading blog. And while my devotionals are interwoven with lessons from nature, it’s like these devotionals about God were suddenly busting out of nowhere. Of course, the enemy brought condemnation from another angle – “You’re going to lose followers.” “People don’t want to read about God.” “People will think you’ve gone crazy.” “Who are you to be writing devotional materials? You’ve never been to Bible college or anything.” “You’ll probably write something that isn’t sound and make them believe wrong things about God.” “What gives you the authority to write something like this?”
It was a full-on assault. But I had my fight face on and I knew exactly who’s authority I wrote with – the authority of Jesus. He makes me righteous. And this was something God told me to do. I have a lifelong love of God’s word and of all kinds of writing. I have bits of paper with thoughts, notes and scriptures from years past lying all around the house. When I die, you could just scatter those over me. God uses our gifts and our passions. And it doesn’t matter where we’ve come from, if God tells us to do something, he wants us to do it, and Jesus qualifies us for it.
I’m still writing my Faith Friday posts. I can’t manage to do a one every Friday now, but I’m relying on God as to what I write about and when. And I love it.
Ok, it’s dessert time. The encouragement that I want to leave you with today is, it’s not just about you. If you have a relationship with God, that’s awesome, but are you sowing seeds for him too? Because we can grow into an amazing tree with delicious fruit, but if that tree is kept to itself, how are other trees supposed to grow in God’s kingdom? There is little glory for God, there is little growth in others, if we keep our struggles and the things we’ve learnt to ourselves.
Speaking in front of groups of people, even small groups, is NOT one of my natural strengths. Quite the opposite. I often feel like when I open my mouth to say something it comes out like a cat coughing up a furball. Speaking in front of church is me boasting in my weakness. The reason I was able to get up there and share is that 1) I have learnt to say, “Yes” to God more quickly; 2) I took time to use my strength of writing and seek God to prepare what to say; and 3) I asked the Holy Spirit to give me his power to do it and to say the words that he wanted me to say and not my own. I relied on the power of the Holy Spirit rather extensively. And I was actually excited to share a testimony of what God’s been doing in my life because it was an opportunity. I was sowing seeds that day. And I’m here sowing seeds again today.
How do we know what to sow and where? We spend time with the Master Gardener. We go and find him and follow him around. Because he knows exactly what he’s doing.
“The sower sows the word.” – Mark 4:14
“Sow for yourselves righteousness; reap steadfast love; break up your fallow ground, for it is the time to seek the Lord, that he may come and rain righteousness upon you.” – Hosea 10:12
Questions
- How are you doing at sowing seeds for God? Are you sowing the seeds of victory or are you keeping your experiences to yourself?
- Is there something you know God wants you to sow? Have a chat to him about it.
- How might the enemy be making you feel condemned or trying to thwart God’s plans for you at the moment?
- What are you going to do about it?
All Bible verses are from the ESV (English Standard Version), 2016.
Wild Hope Homestead 